Confessions of a married woman Part 1

A Confession of a Married Woman

Posted by Abby Fayokun on Friday, November 25, 2011

''I don't understand why you have to be so difficult about this'' Deborah said to her husband ''One day, you are all into it, another, you complain like hell'' she said frustrated.

''I know I agreed you could go back to work but Its getting on me, your work take a toil on you and you hardly have time for us at home'' He said back at her.

''Dewale , what is it you want from me?'' she asked. '' I do everything I'm suppose to do as a wife for you and my kid even as I have no help at home, your food is on time, the house is always spotless. I do my best to do everything as you would want it. What else do you want from me? She asked.

''All I want is to see you more often at home, like when I get home early, you even work on Saturdays'' he said

''Why are you so selfish? All those time when I was all alone at home with our daughter and you go to work, you remember, you work all late at nights and endless meetings and conferences all over, days you travel and all, I endured and was patient with you. Now, why can't you do the same for me, I am starting to build up a career for myself and now, you want me to quit'' she said angrily.

''No one is asking you to work Deborah, is there anything you want that I don't provide for you, you have all you need. I don't see why you have to go out to work'' he answered back.

''Dewale, I am not working because of the money and you know that, I love a challenge; I love to work, do something new. I can't stand it any more, moaning about in the house all day. I found something that I am good at and now, you want me to quit''.

''Deborah, I've had enough of these arguments. You know, these days, I do wonder where your priorities lie. I have made my decision and going to bed'' he said leaving the room.

''Commander Chief of armed forces'', Deborah called after him, ''you can't control me okay, I also have my own life to live''. She kept lamenting after her husband, while Dewale ignored her.

After sleeping for few hours, Dewale realised Deborah was not in bed, so he went into the sitting room and found her sleeping on the couch.

''Debby'', he touched her

‘‘Hmm'', she murmured.

''Please come to bed'', he said.

''Oh oh Dewale, please leave me alone'', she said. ''Hah, do you want to control my sleep too'', she hissed and went back to sleep.

Dewale stood there staring at the wife he loved so much, slipping away from him. He wondered if he handled the matter in the right way or his insecurities were getting ahead of his relationship with His wife. He loved it when he gets home every day and meets her in the house, waiting on him, giving all her attention to him but now that she started working, she's been so busy that he missed her so much. He's missed all the attention, her depending on him. One day. He surprised her at work to take her to lunch, he was taken back by how much commanding she was at work, not in a bad way but seeing his wife with so much confident scared him. She was good at what she does and she was the best. He saw how she attended to all her clients, all smart and beautiful she was. Although, he knew he was way out of line telling her to quit her job just because of his selfish interest but he would rather do that than to lose her to her job or another Man. He knows no Man would look at how beautiful and intelligent she is and walk away, these days, men don't care how many wedding rings you have on your fingers, they still chased after them. He knows this because, he sees how his married business partners run after women, even married women and he despises this a lot. He does trust His wife but not the craving wolves out there and he sure would to do everything to keep them away from his queen.

.........................

The next day, Debby did her best to ignore Dewale, prepared his breakfast and hurried out of the house as she would have to drop her daughter first at the day care. She was not ready to give in to him yet, she wanted to work and would make him realise how much this means to her. Debby knew she could get anything she wanted from her husband and she knows well how to get him to do her biddings but she was still determined to stay angry with him to get his attention.

After a long day at work, she had one last client to see before she goes home.

''Hello Mr.....'', looking through her appointment book, ''Williams''

''Call me Tunde'', the gentleman said offering his hands

''Oh my God!'' Debby exclaimed, Tunde! She said excited.

''Oh my!'' Deborah, Tunde said hugging her. I can't believe this'', he said laughing.

''I know'', Debby said, ''Please, let's go into my office'', she said, showing the way.

''How have you been?'' Debby asked.

''Me? right now, feeling so great'', he said. ''You?''

''I'm great'' Debby said, ''so so surprise to see you Pastor Tunde'', she joked. ''You are still a pastor right?'' she asked

''Oh yes, very much a pastor'', he smiled. ''I just moved into town and decided to come open an account at this branch'', he said.

‘‘That’s good'', Debby said smiling at him.

........................

Meeting Tunde that day for Debby was the most wonderful thing for her. Both Tunde and Deborah had dated for a long time, First love, she would say.  They planned their life together, their dream home and their future. Things became tough for them when Deborah's parent pressured her into leaving the relationship. They insisted that they had no future together. After so much pressure and threat to disown Debby, she eventually broke it off with Tunde. The breakup was so painful that she had to break all contact and even moved to another city to start a new life. It's being three years now but seeing Tunde today woke up those feelings she thought had gone away. How she loved him and wanted things to work for them.

Getting home that day, she tried to avoid any confrontation with her husband since they have been giving themselves the silence treatment. She wouldn't say they have both fallen out of love for each other but things have become so dull between them, like the passion had gone. All they do is argue about little things they could overlook and when they aren't fighting, it's the silence treatment. They both slept on the separate side of their beds.

..............................

After several days of catching up with Tunde on phone, texting and chatting, They eventually planned to meet up for dinner at Tunde's place.

''I can see you still got the cooking touch'', Debby said smiling.

‘‘Oh yea....'' he smiled

‘‘Hmm.....'', she smiled.

''Since you ran away, I did comfort myself with my cooking'', he joked

''C'mon, I didn't run away'', she smiled getting up to clear the table.

''Please no'', he insisted. ''You are the guest''

''It's the least I could do, you did all the cooking, let me do the cleaning''. She said clearing the dishes to the kitchen.

As she washed the dishes, she smiled to herself. 'Irony', who would imagine her washing dishes in Tunde's house after all these years, just then, she felt his hands round her waist.

''Tunde'', she whispered.

''I know, I can't help myself Debby'', he said as he held unto her tightly.

‘‘Oh'' she groaned as she felt his lips on her neck kissing her. ''Please'', she turned around, ''Don't let us do this, Please'', she said

''I'm sorry Debby'', he said releasing her''. ''You are right, we shouldn't be doing this. You know how much I have thought of you since you left. I tired working on other relationships, but they never work, never Debby. He said with so much pain. I missed you Deb, I missed you so much.

As he said those words, tears filled her eyes, she was unsure of what to say or how to act. She knew what her head was saying to her, she ached to pull him closer to herself, tell him everything would be fine.

''You remember when we used to sit all day talking about our future, things we would do, ministry, our house, kids........''. He asked

‘‘Hmm'' she smiled

''Yea, those days, wished I could go back there, Come'', he said, ''Let me show you something'', pulling her away to the door. ''Remember, when we talked of how we wanted to build our house, entering the house, the first thing you want to see is the crystal light chandelier hanging from the ceiling'' he said excited.

''Yes'' Debby answered.

''See, he said showing her the beautiful chandelier hanging on the ceiling, and then, all you want to see is a big sitting room with the couches in a big circle, see'' pointing at the arrangement of the house, filled with so much excitement as he explained the whole details according to what they had both planned  eight years ago, laughing and smiling. ''I did it Debby, It took me two years to buy the perfect land and I had to build it, I had to, he said to himself and stopped for a minute.

''I had to Debby, that was the only way to keep you alive in my heart. I can't seem to get it right with another person; my heart aches for you my dear. This is all for you'', looking into her eyes

Just at that moment, his lips pressed against her lips so passionately that she gave in to him, she found herself releasing her body to him, more like, she’s being longing for it. She held unto him as long as she could, her mind totally blank of all sanity, afraid to think. He lifted her unto the couch and just then, she felt him unbuttoning her blouse, kissing her neck all the way to her mouth, so engrossed in having all of her. Before she knew it, he was thrusting into her; she felt hot tears flowing from her eyes as she gave into him

...................................

The drive back home was the hardest she ever did in her life. She felt her heart beating faster than usual, her hands shaking and fear all over her. ''What have I done!'', she asked herself as tears flowed from her eyes. It was a feeling of fear, anger and betrayal. There was no excuse for what happened and she knew the worst is about to happen. How can she face her husband now, she knew she was in big trouble. She spots her husband's car driving into the compound.

As she looked through the window of her house, she noticed there was no light was on. 'Dewale has probably gone to bed', she thought to herself. All she wants to do is run to have a shower. She was grateful for Dewale who had called her in the afternoon and offered to pick up their daughter from day care. Opening the door, she was surprised to see rolls and layers of candle lit on all the way to the stairs leading to their room, seeing pedals of roses on the floor, the house full of scented aroma, she noticed the dinner table was set and scented candles on it. A mixture of fear and betrayal filled her. She followed the candles to the room and as she suspected, all filled with pedals of roses as she had never seen before, glowing candles everywhere and there, her beloved holding a rose for her. As she looked at him, she felt the tears running down her face.

''Sweetheart, I know things have been a little strain between us lately'', he cleared his throat. ''I am sorry honey for being so selfish and absorb in my own world. I should be more considerate and help you, not to put you down. The truth is that, I love that you are a independent woman but sometimes it make me feel unwanted but that shouldn't be. I should be more secure in you, believing in you and encouraging you to be the best God has created you to be, I love you honey and I am so sorry'' he paused searching her face to see how she felt but all he saw was blanked. Just then, he saw her flooded in tears.

''Why are you crying honey?'' moving closer to hold her. ''I am so sorry dear, I know I put you through a lot, I know honey, please forgive me? He asked her looking straight into her eyes. ''I'm going to be there with you, I will help out in the house, even bathe our daughter, clean the house if you want, anything to make things easy for you, anything my dear, I am so sorry honey''.

''No dear'', she finally said in the mist of the tears. ''Oh God'' she cried out, fear of how she would tell her husband. She knew she would not be able to keep this as a secret from him, she had to come clean and that scared her.

''Please Honey, I have offended you'' she said releasing her hands from him. ''I have wronged you dear'' she cried out.

''Debby, What is it? You know you can tell me anything dear'' he moved closer to hold her again.

''Please honey, please don't touch me'', she begged shivering all over.

''Debby, what is wrong?'' he asked again, this time with so much concern.

''I am sorry dear, I am so sorry. I didn't mean to do it...., I was not even thinking....., I don't know what happened.....'', she continued to say crying. ''I don't know what I was doing...., I allowed myself to fall into this. Please, I am sorry...., I am so sorry...'' she collapsed on the floor crying, asking for forgiveness.

Dewale confused and scared seeing his wife in such state. He looked at how scared she was, he wanted to pull her to himself, he wanted to tell her, everything would be fine, wipe her tears but His fears held him back.

''Deborah, what did you do?'' he asked again but this time, his tone was much higher. Deborah hearing his to voice looked at him and realised she had spill it out now.

''I said, what did you do?'' he asked again.

''I cheated on you......'' she cried out. ''I am so sorry.......

''You what... stunned and confused.

''I am sorry......... she cried out

''When....., who......, where......., he asked confused but Debby was afraid to answer his question.

''I said, with whom? This time, he shouted much louder

''Tunde...'' she whimpered.

''Tunde.... he said to himself......

''Which Tunde?' he asked confused looking at her.

''Tunde Williams....., my.........'' confused on the next word

''Oh....Tunde......'' he said realising who he was. Then, he became silence, then, he laughed nervously, then stopped and looked at her again.

''When?'' he shouted at her.

''I......’’afraid to answer. Then, he moved closer to her, this time, Debby moved away scared he was going to hit her.

''When? He shouted

''This afternoon, she cried out.

''You mean, today, this afternoon; while I was planning a surprised dinner for my wife, cooking and cleaning my ass off, you were sleeping with another man'', he chuckled. ''I dropped Temidayo with your mum so we could spend time together, I wanted to spend time with MY WIFE and she was there sleeping with another man, this same Tunde'', he chuckled again. ''Unbelievable'' he shouted at her face. ''Debby, you are unbelievable. I can't believe this’’.

''Dewale, please.......''

''Don't you Dewale me'', he shouted.

''I can't believe you, you know, I fought like hell to get you over this same Tunde, I went through a lot to get you to marry me, I waited for you, I was patient, I did everything you wanted me to do, You know it all. He couldn't have you then, so you went to sleep with him now, just to see how good he is in bed, isn't it? He shouted.

''No...... this was a mistake, He showed up at my work place few weeks ago and things went out of hand, please Dewale, I am so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you...... please....'' she begged him.

''You know what? You can have him, I release you whole heartedly'', he shouted. ‘‘You never for once loved me, I knew it, no matter how much I love you, how much I waited for you to love me on your terms, No...., you only agreed to marry me just because you had nowhere to go, now he's back, you can do anything you want to do'', he said going downstairs while Debby ran after him.

''No Dewale, this was a mistake, I love you honey, you are my life, you are everything I want, Please, forgive me'' she said running after him. She heard her phone ringing from the table where she left her bag but ignored it.

He scoffed, ''Indeed, you love me,'' he said looking towards her phone, slamming the door in her face.

Debby heard him got into his car and drove off. She knew there was no point to chase after him. Clearly he was angry, Debby had never seen him this way before and that scared her. She slummed on the floor and cried her heart out. She never wanted to hurt him and Dewale was very wrong at one thing. She does love him, she loved him with everything she has. Tunde was her past and would remain that way, but he was the one she fell in love with everyday of her life, he is the father of her child, he is her lord, her highness, the Man that brought so much happiness to her. She couldn't live without him. As she continued to cry, she heard her phone ringing again, not sure who it was, she went over and seeing it was Tunde, she grew so angry that she threw it on the floor and cried herself out.

...................................

Debby woke up to the sound of the door bell. She quickly ran to the door thinking it would be Dewale since he didn't come home last night as She waited all night and finally slept off on the couch.

''Dewale'' she said opening the door but to her surprised, she found Tunde standing at her door step.

''How dare you'' she shouted, ''What are you doing here'' she asked, looking over his shoulder

''I'm sorry to come here Debby, the way you cried out of my house yesterday, I tried calling you but you didn't return my calls, I was afraid something happened to you. I have been here all day yesterday and today, seeing your car was parked outside, I asked your security and he said your husband wasn't in'' he said looking at her. ''What happened?'' he asked seeing her face all swollen up from the tears

''What happened?'' she shouted back at him, ''You happened, you have destroyed me Tunde, you have destroyed my marriage, Isn't that what you wanted all along, destroy what I have so that I can run back to you, isn't it'', she shouted at him.

''No Debby, I love you, what happened yesterday was not planned, I just wanted to spent time with you, I love you Debby'' she said

''How dare you Tunde, I am married now and I love my husband, I made a terrible mistake yesterday, meeting you again, I regret it with my life, I regret meeting you ever Tunde'' she cried at him.

''Please Debby, don't say that'' he said looking over his shoulder. ''This is not the right place to talk about this, Can we meet later please'' he asked

''I never want to see you again'' she shouted at him.

''You can't do that Debby, I love you. I can't do anything without you, please'', he said

''What!'' It's been three years Tunde, you lived your life before you saw me again, didn't you?''

''I lived a terrible life, I searched for you after you left, I tried another relationship but none worked, then, I started searching, I searched everywhere until I found you. I could not do anything Debby, I failed at every relationship, I left my ministry, it was all in a mess, I could not concentrate. I had to find you, please.'' he begged with tears from his eyes.

''So what do you expect me to do, leave my husband and run back to you'' she said back at him

''All I know is that I love you Debby and I would do anything to have you back'' he said back at her

Then, Debby heard her house phone ringing, but she couldn't get herself to leave the door, she was stunned hearing what Tunde was saying. She saw a different Man from the one she knew years ago, she saw a man with no sense of purpose, a man drifting away on a lost mission. He was changed. Eventually, she left the door to answer the phone.

''Yes'' she said

''Mrs Adebanjo'' she heard the other end

''Yes, Can I help you?'' she asked.

''My name is Doctor Olamide from St Thomas hospital, we have been trying to reach you on your mobile all night but just found you land line''.

''I'm sorry, what is this about'' she asked

''Your Husband was brought here yesterday night after a collision............

''What!'' she screamed out, dropped the phone, picked up her bag and ran out.

''What is it?'' Tunde asked following her to the car.

''Have you seen what you have caused me?'' she shouted at him in tears. ''Listen and listen carefully, don't ever call me again, don't come near me, never again do I want to see your face, do you hear me? She shouted in tears and drove off.....

....................................................

To be continued......